Gurkha Xtreme | Cigar Review

Wrapper: Nicaraguan
Binder: Proprietary
Filler: Proprietary
Size: 6 x 56 “Toro”
Body: Medium/Full
Price: $12.00 MSRP

Today we take a look at the Gurkha Xtreme.

I know, I know. Before you give me shit for reviewing the dreaded Hansotia product, give me a chance to explain. They were gifted to me and I’ve had them for some time now. It’s actually a good cigar. I don’t need to write another shitty review so your patience, please.
Plus, I only have a few more cigars to review. So sue me! You’ll read this and like it or I’m on my way to your house with the red rubber enema bag…with an extra-large hose!

BACKGROUND:
Who the hell knows?

DESCRIPTION:
Another rough looking cigar. Visible seams. Lots of veins. A mottled, oily dark coffee bean color. Lots of small tooth. Extremely light in the hand. Could blow away outside if left on a table. A so so triple cap. And some stupid looking cigar band that seems to be aimed at 10 year olds who play video games.

SIZES AND PRICING:
Grand Robusto: 5 x 54 $11.00 MSRP ($8.20 at CI)
Toro: 6 x 56 $12.00 MSRP ($8.95 at CI)
Gordo: 6 x 60 $13.00 MSRP ($9.70 at CI)
Average of $4.00 each on Cbid. Go Hansotia!

AROMAS AND COLD DRAW NOTES:
From the shaft, I can smell sweet dark chocolate, spice, Indian spices, sweet summer fruit, cinnamon, cedar, and coffee.
From the clipped cap and the foot, I smell delicious dark chocolate, strong spice, and gingerbread cookies.
The cold draw presents flavors of cocoa, ginger, spice, and cinnamon.

FIRST THIRD:
Wow. The draw is fantastic and I’m attacked with red pepper like a strong Pepin Garcia blend. Pepper bomb alert!
Lots of other good flavors arriving on the scene: Malts…lots of them, chocolate, cinnamon (Red Hots), smoky meat, sweet cedar, creaminess, peat, cappuccino, and rich earth notes.
That’s what I like.

The cigar starts off with a bang and I hope this is just the beginning of transitions and complexity.
But it’s a big mutha’ so this will take a while. But it’s a lovely Sunday morning in the 40’s at the moment. And no Packers game. Bye.

Wrapper begins to crack all over the shaft.
I switch cigars. The first one had a crack in the cap so I glued it. I’m afraid that the moisture from my mouth will break the bond.
The one I just put down had a major missing part of wrapper in the bottom third and the heat opened it up.
Can’t get a break. Good one Hansotia.

It’s OK. I was less than half an inch into the first one before I switched. Besides the cap, this one looks blemish free.
I was right. This is an excellent tasting Gurkha. Every bit as good as any of the boutique blends I’ve reviewed as of late.
Strength hits medium/full pretty quickly.

Citrus shows up and gives the flavor profile a nice tangy tartness. A cross between orange and tangerine…with a wisp of lemon.

Surprisingly, the char line is behaving nicely, thank you.

This is a really solidly packed stick. A real slow roll. Maybe I will recite the Emancipation Proclamation to kill time.
This is the smokiest cigar in a very long time. It will definitely wake up Charlotte from her Golden Slumbers.

I got a big surprise from Robert Arango yesterday. Two sticks of his new DEFCON blend. Big toros. I need to show restraint and discipline concerning the time I allow them in my humidor. Will be very hard. But one cigar is gorgeous and the other is really funky.

Look at the photos below to see tree trunk sized veins. And the last photo shows how different the wrappers are in color:

Back to the Gurkha Xtreme.
I’m loving this cigar. Strong, manly, and full of zip and zest. Like me.
The Gurkha Xtreme is now very complex, has a very nice balance, and a long, chewy finish. I could dig a box of these. Let’s see what Cbid has them going for today.
And they have none up for auction. I check CI and the 10 count boxes are all sold out at the more expensive price. I do believe that word of mouth has been berry berry good to Hansotia.

SECOND THIRD:
Smoke time is 30 minutes.
The Gurkha Xtreme is worth your time and money as long as it as a discounted price on Cbid.
I’m not saying that this blend ain’t worth $10. What I’m saying is why pay that when you can snag them for less than half?
I wonder who really blended this cigar for Hansotia. It is so out of character for 99% of Gurkha blends. It has all the characteristics of a good boutique blend done by a master blender.

Here they are: Spice, chocolate, malts (Chocolate Malt, Coffee Malt, Aromatic malt, and Caramel Malt) [See Malt Chart], creaminess, coffee, citrus, caramel, nutty, honeysuckle, smoky meat, sweet cedar, and peat.
Construction, except for the first stick and this one’s cap has been very good. LOL. I think Darryl Martin sent me these and his sticks are always well aged.

HALFWAY POINT:
Smoke time is 50 minutes.
Great cigar. I can’t believe I’m saying this about a Gurkha.

The spiciness has remained at the top of the list. And it just gets stronger until my lips burn and my tongue feels like I bit into a jalapeno. I love it. Why do I love this pepper bomb. Because the flavors are also so strong that they can’t be masked by the mammoth adult portion of red pepper.
Now that’s some tricked out blending.

Who the hell blended this for him?

Big cigar. Yet time is flying by. Major transitions as fast as duck flying to Cleveland. Super complex. Wonderful balance. Terrific finish.

Now I do remember. Darryl sent me a few of these and I did smoke a couple prior to this review. They were so good that I put them aside in the “Review Section” of my humidor.
This means I have no advice on how long to let these rest before lighting them up. Especially, since the Gurkha Xtreme has been out for a year.

The malt varieties thicken: Chocolate Rye Malt, Flaked Oats Malt, and Honey Malt.
The Gurkha Xtreme is a 3 ring circus.
I don’t have to finish the cigar to tell you I highly recommend snagging some.
With only 3 sizes to choose from, they are mostly big cigars. I bet this cigar blend would have been well served in a Corona size.
The Gurkha Xtreme has needed a few minor touch ups to the char line but nothing to aggravate me over.
A taste of hickory shows up. Goes well with the smoky meat element.
I’m worn out.

LAST THIRD:
Smoke time is one hour 15 minutes.
The Gurkha Xtreme hits a smooth full body. No harshness or heat or bitterness.
All flavors intact.

Next month, I plan to troll Cbid and see if I can score a 5 pack of these sticks.
Well, dear readers, I do believe history has been made on this web site. A rave review for a Gurkha cigar. Alert the media.
This will be the 13th review of a Gurkha right here. The other 12 weren’t bad but they can’t touch this blend.

I think I have a couple more cigars to review then that’s it. The manufacturers and readers that promised cigars for review have let me down. But that’s usually par for the course. Only a core group of people actually come through. So I don’t get upset when I am promised that cigars are on the way. I generally say “Uh-huh” in my head, with eyes rolled up, when I read those emails.
Keep checking Cbid.
Final smoke time is one hour 35 minutes.

RATING: 90

And now for something really, really different:
I first published this story in May of 2013.

I’ve never told this story to anyone but a few close friends. That is because telling this story makes people think I’m friggin’ nuts. But I had a close encounter of the third kind.
It was 1999. I worked at a place that expected us to start at 6am. I lived about 20 minutes away and it was all freeway travel.

Naturally, it was dark outside when I left for work. It was winter in Mesa, AZ. I hadn’t traversed but a few miles when I saw something strange ahead of me, on the left side of the freeway; maybe half a mile up.

As it got closer, I could make out a form. It looked like those old fashioned helicopter clear bubbled cockpits from the Korean War. But in this case, all I could see was the bubble. It was like clear glass as it approached, and then I saw a figure inside. But this bubble had no wings or helicopter blades or jet engine or propellers. No outward sense of what propelled this thing. It was just a bit smaller that the size of the helicopter bubble. The figure inside looked like a normal sized man. And it moved slowly as if it were observing the cars on the freeway.

All of a sudden, it did a dive, and a swoop, into traffic. Cars swerved to miss it and luckily no fender benders occurred because it was so early. The bubble swooped up gracefully and went back to the left side of the freeway hovering above the dirt road adjacent to the freeway. It seemed to be toying with the drivers. Why else would it do this?

It hovered on the road next to the freeway just above us. As I slowed down, I could see the figure inside. But now the glass had an opaque-ness to it and I couldn’t make out specific features of the individual driving this thing. I opened the window to listen and there was no sound coming from it. Nothing. It was deadly quiet. I saw no heat signature emitting from the thing which would identify some sort of propulsion system.

It just hovered about 6 feet off the ground and the figure stared out on to the freeway. I could see enough that it was man-like with a head and I could see it turn. There was enough traffic that I could no longer chug along at 10mph and had to move on. I strained to look in the rear view mirror and watched again as it swooped down on to the freeway, amidst the cars, causing them to swerve. It then doubled back to about 100 yards in front of me. This time, it came at me in the middle lane of a three lane freeway. I slammed on the brakes and it just gracefully, and slowly, swooped up to avoid hitting me about 20 feet from my car.

I grabbed my cell phone and dialed 911. I was all adrenaline. I told the operator what I saw. “An alien. In an alien space ship.” I asked if any of the air force bases were doing testing and I got a curt, “No” on the other end.

I hit the accelerator to avoid becoming a crash statistic and lost it behind me. All of the vehicles, who barely avoided being rammed into, hit their accelerators to get the hell out of there. I tried to catch up to see if I could get someone to pull over to discuss what happened; but to no avail.

To this day, I have no idea what I saw. Nothing within my scope of knowledge made what I saw identifiable. A bubble with no wings, no jets, no helicopter blades….just a bubble with a man inside. And it did not make a solitary sound as it maneuvered.

I hoped that the other cars would have reported it. And I listened to the news all day and checked the newspaper the next day. Nothing.

Now you can say, “He’s friggin nuts.”
This photo is the closest thing I could find that is somewhat like what I saw.